Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 07, 2015

My new book is available

This is not game related, but my new comedy book, A Little of Me Goes a Long Way, is now available. It features a collection of my tweets, from the profound to the profane, including such topics as: cats, pants, finger puppets, more pants, poor hygiene, self loathing, and finally, pants.
Examples:
  • "A little of me goes a long way," I told my wife during our honeymoon.
  • After I wash up in a public restroom, I always open the door with my mouth so I don't get germs on my hands.
  • I can motivate myself to put on pants or go outside, but not BOTH!
  • You take my breath away, or that might be the tuberculosis...
  • Golden Corral: Because you're just not fat enough.
  • I'm giving everybody lottery tickets for Xmas because I don't like people very much.
  • I have a big heart, a big morbidly obese heart...
  • Saw a homeless guy surrounded by books sleeping in the park this morning. Just goes to show what an English degree will get you.
  • I wish we could stop fixating on race when there's so many other reasons to hate each other.